Self Control

Tonight, I had a talk with a co-worker of mine and it really opened my eyes to just sit down and talk to somebody with a whole different outlook on life. I feel as if i have corrupted myself as a person. I feel as if I have let a lot of people down. I do things that make me feel great in the moment but when its all over im back to where i was all over again. I dont understand sometimes how i got to the point where i am with the way i was raised...i have a wonderful and amazing family with loving parents who care about me so much. I dont know if its insecurity with myself to succeed in things or what? However, I know this for a FACT......If I cannot control a certain area in my life, I will do something to feel that I am in control. I force myself to look as if I am in control but I always end up hurting myself realizing the pain i feel. I know that I am worth more than what ive been giving myself, I am living for a purpose and am a good looking young woman for a reason. I have taken advantage of everything god has given me and thrown it all away for absolutely no reason. I really need to change the ways i think, my whole outlook on life and the way i treat some people. If I dont do this soon I will honestly end up somewhere i never expected to be. I dont know what else to say......